#ldsconf

Hello there! I got to attend my very first session of conference today. It was unbelievable. The spirit there was undeniable. The second I walked into the conference center, I was come over by the most overwhelming feeling. It was amazing. When the prophet walked into the room, the reverence of the saints was angelic. It was only just a mere glimpse of what it will be like when the savior come again. Oh what a joyous day that will be! Being in the same room or even the same building, as our prophets, seers, and revelators, is a spiritual power that I cannot describe. Though they are imperfect men and women, they have been called of God to be our leaders in these latter days. I testify that they truly are called of God and they ARE prophets, seers, and revelators. The Mormon tabernacle choir is amazing. They bring the spirit so well, and being in the conference center and hearing them really sing and feeling the spirit they bring is a blessing for our church. I am so blessed to be able to hear and see the prophets speak today, but I am also blessed to be able to feel the spirit that attended the meeting. The spirit spoke to me on many different occations and my testimony was strengthed by the words of the prophets. I'm so grateful for the opportunity we have to hear from our prophets every six months. I'm so grateful for the amazing opportunity I had to visit the Saturday Morning session of General Conference. Heavenly Father lives. Christ lives. The spirit of the Holy Ghost is real. This church is Christ's church and it is the only 100% true church here on earth. I know these things are true. Christ Lives. He is real. He died for us so we can live with him again. I know it. It happened. It's real. I promise. I am so grateful that I get to be a missionary for this church. Nothing in this world makes me truly happier than sharing this gospel. I love it with all my heart. I say these things in the name of our savior, Jesus Christ, amen.

Sister Missionaries (take 2)

Okay, so I just typed this blog and my phone shut off before I saved it and it deleted the whole thing, so I'm attempting to type it again. Here we go.

So, today I had the opportunity to go to the Salt Lake City Temple Visitors Center with my friends, and we got talking to these amazing sister missionaries. Lately, my friends and I have been feeling very in the dark. I haven't seemed to feel Heavenly Father answering my prayers and what not. So while we were talking, one of the sisters asked us to read 1 Nephi 2:20. It says, "And inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments, ye shall prosper, and shall be led to a land of promise; yea, even a land which I have prepared for you; yea, a land which is choice above all other lands." Then she asked us to switch the word "land" with the word "life" and so it reads, "And inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments, ye shall prosper, and shall be led to a life of promise; yea, even a life which I (God) have prepared for you; yea, a life which is choice above all other lives." The line ".. Even a life which I have prepared for you.." Struck me SO strongly. The spirit was so strongly there in the vistors center, and it was so strong in my heart. I could feel the spirit all around us as we read that scripture. Heavenly Father answers our prayers. I know that he answers our prayers in better ways than we could ever imagine, or plan ourselves. I know that Heavenly Father has prepared this life for us to become our very best selves if we choose. Heavenly Father has a perfect plan for us. I know that he prepared that moment for me to hear it. The spirit testified to my heart that Heavenly Father is real. He is our living God, and He loves us individually beyond imagine. I know Heavenly Father lives. He  truly is the beginning and the end and he loves us more than we can possibly imagine. I know that you are worth more than you could ever imagine. You are worth more than any of God's creations. You are worth D Y I N G for. I know that if I was the only person on earth, Christ still would have died for me. Jesus Christ is the son of the living God. Heavenly Father gave his son so we could have the atonement and live for eternity with Him. God loves you. Heavenly Father has prepared this life for us. Yes, at times I feel like life isn't a blessing at all (being 100% honest) but once those trials are overcome I know 100% without a doubt that Heavenly Father gives us trials because he knows we CAN make it through them. He knows that we are strong enough and that we CAN handle it when we think we can't. Jesus the Christ is my rock and my redeemer, through him I AM strengthen and he makes me strong when I am weak. He is the reason I can live in my Heavenly Father's presence forever. I know this church is true with every fiber of my being. It's real. Christ died for us. For the first time in my life, I have the opportunity to see the prophet of God tomorrow in the flesh. I am over the moon. I am overjoyed! It will be 1 year since the mission age change, and 1 year from the moment I knew that I was called to serve. In a little less that 6 weeks I will know where I will be serving for the next 18 months and I couldn't be happier. Life is hard, but the rewards are so much greater than the sacrifices. I truly know that this church is true. I am so grateful for everything I have been given. I'm so glad I have been called to serve. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are real and their blessings are beyond measure. Nothing in this world would make me happier than to go on a mission, and that's because this happiness isn't worldly. It's coming from the choice to follow the commandments. Like Nephi said, "And inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments, ye shall prosper, and shall be led to a life of promise; yea, even a life which I have prepared for you; yea, a life which is choice above all other lives." I say these things in the name of my savior, Jesus Christ, amen.

By Small and Simple Things...

Well, I have felt the need to share this story, and I honestly think I need to hear myself tell the story to remind myself of the faith I have and what the spirit has already witnessed to me. I pray that I can bring the spirit and if you are reading you can feel it as well.
Well, almost exactly a year ago, I was having a really bad week. I had a lot of concerns and I was mostly concerned with God's timing. All of these things seemed to keep happening at the worst times. In a matter of a week my life had been completely flipped around and I was so sad and mad with God. Finally, one morning I was sitting in my car in the school parking lot getting my things together to go to first period, and I had the prompting to pray. I prayed that I would have a lesson in seminary that would help me. It was a really short prayer, that wasn't of great strength and faith, but just a short and simple prayer. I closed my prayer and hopped out of my car and hurried to my English class. After English got out, I got back into my car and drove to seminary. I walk in and picked a seat one row from the front and directly in the middle. After we have our devotional, my teacher, Brother Mcduffie, starts his lesson. "Have you ever felt like you just have the worst timing in the world?" I just wanted to look around at everyone in the room and say, "Did he just say what I think he said?" I was just in shock. He continued on with the lesson and talked about Christ's birth, and how perfect the timing of it all was. Christ, the savior of the world, was born in the most humble circumstances. He could have been born in a palace with  all the amenities that would have made his birth more noble. But instead, he was born in the most humble of places. My teacher continued on and shared other examples of the perfect timing of the plan. Half way through the lesson my teacher stops. He says, "You know, I didn't plan this in my lesson, but I felt prompted to share it with the last class, and I'm getting the same feeling now." When I heard those words come out of his mouth, I knew that what he was going to say was something of great importance. My heart started to pound so loud, I'm surprised the people next to me didn't hear it. My hands were shaking horribly. My eyes were locked on my teacher but my vision was blurred from the mass amounts of tears swelling up. My ears narrowed out all the outside noises and voices, and I felt as if I was the only student there. My teacher spoke softly, "If you are going through a hard time, remember that everything is going to be okay. Heavenly Father's timing is perfect and it will get better." Those words hit with such force, I almost fell out of my seat. God had not only heard my prayer, but literally answered it. I have never felt the spirit in the room so strongly. I could feel the presence of the spirit. A heavenly being was in that room, I couldn't see it, but I could feel it. My teacher must have noticed the revelation in action because he asked me to share with the class what had just happened. I remember trying to speak but barely having a voice and I was at a loss for words. I was just shaking. I knew exactly what had happened and I knew without a single doubt that God had literally just answered my prayer. I told my teacher that I had prayed that morning for a lesson in seminary that would comfort me, and we did!

 I have never been so grateful of the spirit. He was so in tune with the spirit and I am so glad he followed that prompting. I know that when we follow spiritual promptings then not only are we blessed but others are as well. I KNOW without a doubt that God listens to our prayers. He answers them in a way that is perfect in our time and place. Some answers don't come immediately, some don't come until we least expect it, but if we stay always believing in Christ, they come. God ALWAYS answers our prayers. It may not be they way we want, but he will answer. The Father's plan is perfectly draw out and all we have to do is go to him and follow Christ's example and see the blessings of life shower down on us. I know that if we endure our trials well we are blessed. I am so grateful for the gospel and the safety and comfort it brings me. I pray that you will feel the same spirit while reading this as I did that day. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Because I Have Been Given Much

All my thoughts are consumed with gratitude to my Father in heaven. I am SO blessed. I honestly don't know how I got so lucky to be born into my family, and raised with the gospel. I have thought in the past that I wished I was a convert so I could have really found it for myself. I look back and realize how ungrateful that thought is. I want to look back at myself and say "YOU HAVE THE GOSPEL RIGHT NOW is that not good enough?! You have it. You are SO blessed to have it. It is a gift from God stop wasting your time wishing you had found it yourself and embrace the gift that was given to you!!" I am so lucky to not have to be not have to live off of worldly happiness. I am SO lucky to have the relationship I have with God. I am so lucky to been given this life. I am so blessed. I try to think of HOW I got so lucky and I am at a loss for words. I am so blessed. God has given me so very much. I am alive. I woke up this morning, that is a blessing in itself! I know that I am here for a reason. God wouldn't put us on earth if there wasn't a reason for it. I know that it is my obligation to share the gospel. I know they say it is a priesthood obligation to serve a mission but I feel as though it is my personal obligation. I have been given a gift that I can choose to share or not. I am choosing to share it. What will you do with your gift? Will you let your flame dwell in your soul and eventually burn out? Or will you "forever fan the flame of your faith"? I encourage all those who believe in the gospel to start sharing your testimonies. I promise that the more you share, the easier it gets. It is such a blessing to be here in the last days. I am so grateful for my life. God lives. I know it. I love that I know that. I strive to love all that God has given me, because he has given me so much. I am so happy.

I say these things, in the name of my savior, Jesus Christ, amen.

"God calls us in our weakness, but he qualifies us for his work."

I have officially started my paperwork to become a missionary of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Last Wednesday, I had my appointment with my bishop to start my papers, and oh what a day that was. I have never felt so weird in my life. I use the word "weird" because that is the only word that I can think of to describe how I felt that day. I had made my appointment with my bishop, for 5:40pm that night. When I woke up on Wednesday, I felt very odd. I was nervous because I didn't know what to expect in the meeting, but I got up and got ready for the day. I had gone to the temple and on my way home I just burst into tears. I just cried. I couldn't feel the desire to serve, and I was so nervous for my interview. I did want to serve, I just didn't feel that awesome burning desire. I just cried out of pure frustration. I didn't ever think about not going to my interview, or just not going on a mission all together, but I was just overwhelmed. I felt so weird. I can't describe it. I still wanted to serve, but I didn't feel the burning desire to serve. I just couldn't feel it. I felt like I was in the dark, but I just focused on 5:40. I was finally on my way to my appointment, when I started to feel the darkness lighten. I felt that excitement to serve slowly start to burn brighter. I turned on my favorite hymn, "We'll Bring The World His Truth." The words,
"We have been taught, and we understand,
That we must do as the Lord commands
We are as the army of Helaman.
We have been taught in our youth.
And I will be the Lord’s missionary
To bring the world his truth."
hit me like a ton of bricks. I almost but burst into tears for a second time. I felt the spirit so strongly, it was the first time I had really felt it all day. The desire I had, returned fully to me and I felt so good. During my meeting, my bishop said nothing but positive things, and all my nerves faded. I felt so at peace. The spirit confirmed to me that I am doing what God has planned for me. I am doing God's will by serving a mission. I know now more than ever that when we do submit to God's will and do what he has planned for us, we will receive more blessings and happiness than we can even imagine. God created a perfect plan for us and he wants us to be happy. It's up to us to take the opportunity that God has offered.
There have been so many instances that I have felt so inadequate to preach the gospel. I often think, "I don't know enough" and I feel as though I have just skimmed through life without really understanding the gift that I have been given, and I get really disappointed. I wish I could have really listened and learned in seminary and young women's, but I know that I can only learn from it and move forward. That is why were are here, to learn from our mistakes, and be made whole by God's infinite atonement. I am here on earth, therefore I am not perfect, and I can choose to dwell on that fact or strive to be like Christ. I look at the example of Lot's wive who chose to dwell in the past, and was punished for it. I may not turn into a pillar of salt if I dwell in the past, but I will slow my internal progression severely. I want to become like Christ. I want to live with God again. Sometimes I may slip and fall but I know that Christ is always there ready to help me back up again. I know without a doubt that God needs me out in the mission field and he is so happy that I am doing what he wants. I promise that if you only have a desire to believe, it IS enough. It won't be easy, but as Alma says, "..even if ye can no more than desire to believe, let this desire work in you, even until ye believe.." I know, without a doubt that the gospel is true. I know it. I cannot deny it. I have had the spirit testify to me that it is true. I know that God lives. I know that his plan is perfect. I am so very blessed to have been born with the knowledge of the gospel. I am so grateful for the opportunity to share it with those who don't have the knowledge but are ready for it. I am so excited to serve. I know that my Savior died for me, and that is a gift I will forever be in debt for. I love the gospel with all my heart. I hope and pray that someone will be touched by the spirit while they read this. I leave this with you, in the name of our loving savior, Jesus Christ, amen.

full of thoughts

I had a thought I would like to share about the adversary. I have had times in my life where I have not chosen the right. I am not perfect. I have done things that I have had to repent for, but that is why we are here isn't it? To learn and grow in the right direction. I have had times where I choose not to do what the Lord has asked of me. Afterwards I get to angry with myself thinking, "Was it really THAT hard to just choose the right? Devin, you are so stupid." I know that Satan mischievously plans these things out. I know that he gets me to think that I am weak and I can't stand for whats right. He causes me to get down on myself, so he can get a rise on me. I can't think of a specific time where this happened but I know it has. I know that Satan works on me. I can feel him. I can feel him all around me at times. At times I think I have lost my thoughts and my knowledge of the truth in the darkness that Satan surrounds me with, but I know that my Savior is there with his hand outstretched waiting for me to grab it. Sometimes I can't see it (feel it), but I have to have faith that He is there. I know that I am worthy to serve a mission. The only doubts I have about serving are coming from Satan. I know that by sharing what I know I make myself stronger and I pull myself closer to God. I am so grateful for the goodness of the Savior. I know that he has he hand outreached always waiting to help us. Even in the darkest abyss he is there ready to pull us to safety. I am ever so grateful and full of love for my Savior. I love the knowledge that I have been blessed with. I love the gospel and all it does for me in times of darkness and I say these things humbly in the name of my beloved savior, Jesus Christ, amen.

Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence

"With any major decision there are cautions and considerations to make, but once there has been illumination, beware the temptation to retreat from a good thing. If it was right when you prayed about it and trusted it and lived for it, it is right now. Don’t give up when the pressure mounts. Certainly don’t give in to that being who is bent on the destruction of your happiness. Face your doubts. Master your fears. 'Cast not away therefore your confidence.' Stay the course and see the beauty of life unfold for you."
- Elder Jeffery R Holland "Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence" March 1999

If you ask any missionary (future, current, or returned) they will have had some sort of feelings of opposition while deciding to serve. I know I have, MANY times. I have felt myself doubt that decision to serve and if it is right for me. I have had many thoughts of feeling unworthy. At one point I felt completely lost and I wasn't planning on serving at all. I know I haven't even started my papers, but I can already feel the adversary trying so hard to stop me from serving the Lord.

About 2 years ago on a Sunday, I was sitting in Sunday School just dying to go home already. I remember thinking how tired and bored I was. Little did I know, that in Young Women's that day my mind and heart would be open to something that would change my life forever. I didn't know that the adversary knew what God had planned for me that day. I also didn't know yet, that the adversary worked in such mischievous ways. When third hour rolled around, I walked into Young Women's and saw two sister missionaries sitting in our class. I didn't know why they were there or what they were doing but I just walked in and found a seat. We did opening exercises and our Young Women's president turned the time over to the sisters to teach our lesson. At that time of my life, I had no idea what sister missionaries did. I honestly didn't fully know what Elders did either. Serving a mission was something I had never thought about doing. They gave a lesson and left a lot of time for questions. I don't remember the lesson they gave or most the questions that were asked, all I remember is that leaving church that day I thought to myself, "If I am 21, and not married or seriously dating anyone, I will serve a mission."

That thought had stuck in my mind until that Saturday morning last October. I remember I was getting ready for a dance day-date and I had been reading twitter when people started tweeting about the age change. I ran to the T.V. faster than I have probably ever ran in my entire life. I turned it on and heard the words, "Today I am pleased to announce that able, worthy young women who have the desire to serve may be recommended for missionary service beginning at age 19, instead of age 21." spoken by Thomas S. Monson. Those words shook me but I have never felt so sure about anything in my then 17 years of life.Even today as I read those words, I get the same feeling I got when I heard them that October morning. I will serve a mission at 19 years old.

It took me a while to really understand that I am going to serve a mission in a year and a half rather than three and a half years. I remember praying a lot to really know if that is really what the Lord wanted of me. I received my answer early in November. It was just after the election and a lot of people were upset about Romney not being elected. The whole time I had just this overwhelming peace and I knew it was going to be okay. I had a friend text me and asked me to help her understand why this was God's plan and why this had happened. She was really upset. I just felt the need to bare my testimony to her about the Lord's timing and his perfect plan. I told her that I know that God has a plan, and it is perfect. It may seem scary at times but God knows what is best for us. When I spoke those words to her, I knew that baring my testimony felt so good. I knew that sharing the gospel and spirit with people was what I needed to do. I knew then more than ever that I am going to be a missionary with or without a tag.

I can feel the adversary trying to drag me away. If I skip reading my scriptures one night, the night after is so hard to get myself to read. If I am listening to even the smallest temptation from the devil, I notice a difference in the spirit I feel. I have been reading in 2 Nephi, and chapter 28 it talks a lot about the cunning ways of the devil. In verse 21 it says, "And others will he pacify, and lull them away into carnal security, that they will say: All is well in Zion; yea, Zion prospereth, all is well—and thus the devil cheateth their souls, and leadeth them away carefully down to hell." It says in this scripture that Satan makes us believe that even if we sin, "All is well in Zion." I testify its not. You cannot justify sin. If you feel as though you have sinned and its not "that" bad, I promise that Satan is trying to pull you "carefully down to hell". You may think, "Well that's a little dramatic, going to hell for going to bed early instead of reading my scriptures?" He does is carefully. It starts small. Anyways, the adversary wants us to be like him: unhappy. Last week, I made my appointment to start my papers. I have never felt the spirit of the devil so strongly. I was at work when the ward secretary texted me and told me when my appointment was. I said, "I just made my appointment to start my papers!!" Right as the word "papers" rolled off my tongue, I got this sudden feeling of doubt and unworthiness. I can promise that I have nothing to be doubtful of. I am worthy to serve a mission. I know that it was Satan trying to tempt me to not start my papers.

I know this is only the beginning of my missionary service, and I know there will be more times where Satan will try and tempt me. I also know that my Savior is on my side, and if I choose to follow him with all my heart, might, mind, and strength, nothing will harm me spiritually. I know that by serving a mission, I am doing what God wants me to do, and what he has planned for me. I know that there is a reason I was Young Women's the day those sister missionaries taught. I know that God knew what was in store for me and that he was preparing me for my service as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I know that God's plan is perfect. I know that my Savior, Christ the Lord, has helped me through so many times where I couldn't have done it on my own. I am so incredibly blessed to have the knowledge of the truthfulness of this gospel. I love my Savior. I love all that he has done for me. I can't wait to serve a full time mission and help bring others unto Christ. I love the happiness the gospel brings me and I can't wait to share the light.
I say these things in the name of my savior, Jesus Christ, amen.

Mustard seed.

This is my first blog post ever and I couldn't think of a better way to start off than by sharing my testimony! I want you to know that I know that God is real. I know that I belong to the only true church on this earth. I know that my Savior died for me so I could strive to be like him and return to my Heavenly Father again. I know without a doubt that Joseph Smith saw God and Jesus. I know that he was called to restore the gospel to the earth. I know that we are in the last days and I know that I am here to share the gospel. I have been blessed with the gift of the gospel since the day I was born. I would be so incredibly selfish if I didn't share what has been so graciously given to me. I know that you don't have to have a missionary tag to share that gospel. I know that the gospel brings REAL eternal happiness. I know that God lives and loves each and everyone of us. I know our Savior suffered for our sins and he know exactly what you are going through. He knows your struggles and your sorrows. He wants to help you if you just let him, and I promise he is there. You just need faith. "And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you." (Matthew 17:20) When I was little, I had this necklace with a mustard seed on it. I lost it when I moved to St. George and I have been thinking a lot about that necklace lately and I actually found one at the store few days ago! I love the symbolism in it. When I think about the mustard seed, I think about Elder Holland's talk from the last conference. "Lord I Believe" is one of my most favorite talks I have ever heard. I read it at least once a week because of the power and conviction Elder Holland has. One of my favorite lines is, "The size of your faith or the degree of your knowledge is not the issue—it is the integrity you demonstrate toward the faith you do have and the truth you already know." I have had times in my life where I have completely leaded on The Lord and had to just trust that he would help me through a hard time. I promise that if you stay true to the faith you have and understand that you have to trust The Lord. I am going to start onto another topic if I don't stop so just know that The Lord loves you. The church is true. I mean that with every fiber of my soul. I could never deny the spirit I have felt. I testify that God lives and that Jesus died for us. I love the Gospel and I'm so grateful for the blessings I have. I don't know how people sign off on blogs sooo bye. 

I say these things in the name of my Savior, Jesus Christ, amen.

K bye.